Fucked-up Friday

April 3, 2009

I should’ve known when I saw the email in my inbox around noon that it would be fucked up. The email said that locks in my building would be re-keyed–there was a recent theft–and keys for offices would be available in DUFMB, a building I never heard of, after 4 PM. I usually leave by 2 on Fridays. I put my head back down into the 4-inch pile of grading I need to get through. About 1-ish, I heard someone at my door but then got distracted by an email and then a Blackboard problem. I got up to go check on a document in the main office and something told me to see if my lock had been changed. My key no longer fit in the lock. I said, Shit, and looked at my office–my wallet and keys in my unlocked desk, the heater on, boom box playing since my office computer has no speakers, my personal books, the printer that I bought because there was no way I was getting one from D’oh, and had to take the chance of leaving my door open to go find out what the fuck was going on.

I found out–yes, locks changed. The locksmith, a subcontractor, said the keys would be ready soon over in DUFMB. Once I figured out what fucking building that was, I walked over with another professor. And talked to one of the nastiest looking, rudest administrators around there, and that’s saying something. Her attitude was that we were being unreasonable expecting to get back into our offices in the middle of a work day. She lied and said a master key was being sent over. When? In a few minutes. She also lied and said the keys would be ready sometime today, she couldn’t “give [us] a timeline.” I walked down the stairs with the other professor dropping fuck, fucking and motherfuckers into every single clause. When I got back to the division office, I went off. Fuck this, fuck that, motherfucking bitch, ugly ass whore, fuck this place, when I get in my office, it’s over, this day and week are fucking DONE, lock me out my fucking office WHILE I’m sitting in it? Shit.

10 minutes later, the administrative assistant opened our office doors for us. I packed my stuff, shut down the computer, and slammed the door behind me.


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